A Piglet's Island Adventure
by Joe JS Smitty
Summary: In an attempt to make himself a better man, one bandana wearing piglet winds up on an island that is far beyond his knowledge and understanding.  XOver with Nagasarete Airantou.  Chapter 1 up!


Disclaimer: **Ranma ½** and **Nagasarete Airantou** are property of their respective companies and I claim no ownership over them.

Author's Note: To give you a brief rundown of how this fic is working, I'll start off with continuity. **Nagasarete Airantou** is during the anime seasons, which some of you may or may not have seen yet. The **Ranma ½** storyline starts sometime after the manga ends, when Akane and Ranma's wedding is interrupted. The only thing that fans of the anime **Ranma ½** will notice is Akari Unryu, Ryoga's "girlfriend".

Due to the fact that **Nagasarete Airantou** is not sold in America yet, I will try to center this chapter entirely on the Ranma character, and introduce **NA** characters as they appear.

If by some chance this fic catches on and people enjoy it, I will continue, alibi at a sacrifice to **NA **knowledge. I really want to complete this story, so feedback is appreciated!

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**_A Pot-Bellied Pig's Island Journey_**

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_Dear Akane,_

_I write to regretfully inform you, that I will be taking another trip so that I may train to become a stronger and more suitable man for_ (the next part is so hastily written that it's unreadable)_. By the day's end I expect to be in the Northern reaches of Hokkaido to prepare for several long and excruciating months of winter training, that I hope will hardened my nerves and bring myself to the peek of my limitations. But I shall return in due times. Farewell for now Akane,_

Ryoga Hibiki

**One week later…**

"Hey Ryoga, back so soon?" An unenthusiastic Ranma asked as he perched atop the wall surrounding the Tendo Dojo, snacking on an apple. Looking down, he saw his friend and rival, Ryoga, looking nervously up at him.

"Ranma? What are you doing in Sapporo?" Ryoga asked.

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Blue, fluorescent waves cascaded over the white sand of a tropical beach. Overhead, gulls and albatross called to each other to let the others know of a fresh carcass. And there stretched out on the beach, huddled in the wrappings of a five hundred pound umbrella, was a tiny, black little piglet.

How the umbrella, with it's massive weight, had managed to stay afloat in the ocean for ANY amount of time surprised even the piglet, who, in this form, could not move it an inch.

So he just lay there. The tropical sun beating down hard on his soft little body, as his muscles trembled and shuddered in stiffness. His tiny yellow and black bandana grasped firmly between his teeth so as not to fall off, he mustered all his strength to shift sides.

"Eh? What's this?" A quiet voice cooed from across the beach. The exhausted piglet slowly looked upwards towards the sound and saw the robe-draped feet that softly walked towards him.

There was a calming feeling as a soft hand was placed on the piglet's temple, and it stroked his wet, slippery skin. Elation ran over the piglet, as he looked further up the young girl's body, who now kneeled beside him. She looked very young, but at the same time shown a depth of years and understanding.

Of course, this is the same piglet that is repeatedly being tricked by the same red-haired girl into thinking she is interested in him.

But still the young girl looked calm at her center as she gazed upon the piglet with large brown eyes. Her blackish-blue hair was tied on both sides of her face with a silk ribbon, probably to emphasize the white and red priestess robe she wore. Delicate feet were wrapped in socks and tied together with a zori, all-in-all giving her the sensation of a cute, tiny priestess.

"You're hurt," her humorless voice commented as she placed her hand underneath the piglet and lifted him up.

_"Such a sweet girl!"_ The piglet thought as she cradled him like a baby. Suddenly, the piglet began to feel a little bit better, and hoped that once his true nature was revealed, that everything would work out just fine.

"It's okay. You'll be out of your misery soon." She whispered softly as she walked back into the wooded area, near a beaten path.

_"That's right…"_ the piglet thought, _"I'll soon be out of my misery and…"_

"Squee?"

"You will not suffer long, rest assured."

No, the piglet was not assured. In fact he was very, very worried about what she was saying, and he thought he did a good job of trying to tell her so by grunting and squirming in her hands.

"I am a shrine maiden, therefore it is my duty to help the spirits of the departed to their final resting place."

"SQQUUUEEE!!!"

"Ara…" she said meticulously, "I realize it hurts, but do not worry. The walk is not far." It was a poor attempt to guess at the piglet's thrashing and squealing as he desperately tried to break free of her curious stranglehold on him.

With tears streaming down his eyes, the piglet tried his hardest to escape her generosity while at the same time trying to understand why she insisted on trying to comfort him.

_"Gomen!"_ he screamed in his mind,_ "I know I vowed never to hurt a woman! But I can't die like this!"_ Pangs of guilt barely touched the agony of an early demise, and the piglet firmly came down on her hand that rested below his neck.

CHOMP!

Freedom! The girl dropped him the moment his teeth touched sensitive nerves, only ever making her give off a slight yelp. Thirty, no, better make it forty yards away was a safe distance before he decided to turn around and see for himself the damage he had caused. Was she hurt?

_"She's shaking, I may have bit too hard. I better go apolo-huh?" _On closer observation she was trembling rather feverishly…but if there is one thing this little piglet could recognize more than anything, it was the powerful, practically overwhelming presence of a demonic aura.

For you see, he had not only bit a shrine maiden, he had bit a shrine maiden with a bad attitude, a short temper, a strong craving for pork and oddly enough an experienced voodooist.

"Hu hu hu hu hu hu…" she chuckled evilly as the aura increased. Now the piglet turned to stone at the sound of her evil laugh, something he knew instinctively was bad news. The loud growling of her stomach only deepened his understanding of the situation, "Such a shame…if you had gone peacefully it would not have had to come to this. But unfortunately…"

_"This is definitely not good!" _the piglet thought to himself, commenting on the sudden stop in her sentence. Watch the fingers little one! They are a sure sign of an imminent-

"WE HAVE TO DO THIS THE HARD WAY!" she screamed at once and charged. Little time was used to observe the glowing eyes and curling hair, as the piglet…

"SSSSSSSSQQQQQQQQQQUUUUEEEEEEEEE!!!"

And like a gunshot, they were off. A six-foot wall of dust followed the girl and piglet, and a high-pitched squealing warned those traveling that particular road that moment would understand how weird a day this would be.

There was really no time to worry about direction and location at that minute for the little piglet, although truth be told it was for the better. His sense of direction is greatly heightened when a hungry predator is chasing him, not that it mattered as he just ran in one direction. Away from her.

Up ahead on the road, two figures quickly made their way towards the piglet. He hadn't realized yet how fast him and the girl were booking it. As the two figures drew closer, the piglet could tell beyond a shadow of a doubt that these two were also female.

_"Please let one of them be of a kind heart merciful Kami!"_

"YOU WILL GO GREAT WITH UDON!" the girl taunted in a deep, dark voice that did not belittle her current appearance. Oh where had that sweet, young-looking girl gone to?

"SQQQUUUEE!" He squealed with what little oxygen he had left in his lungs. The two girls were coming up fast as he got a fast glimpse of them. The one on the right was tall with long red hair, and an open work-shirt. The one on the left was smaller and tinier, but not by much. Long black hair with tightly wrapped garbs, she screamed ninja. The piglet decided to take his chance with the one that didn't look like it was carrying a katana.

"Oi Machi-nee!" the girl on the right called in her slightly masculine voice, "What are you in such a rush this mor-?"

What was that little black blur in front of her? With a tiny yellow bandana wrapped around its neck? A piglet? Here? And a tiny face screaming of unmitigated fear and horror?

_"SANCTUARY!"_ the piglet screamed in his mind as he flew casually into her (unknowing) welcome arms.

Uh-oh. He missed his mark. And right into a pair of heaving, ginormous-

Pafu!

Splattered deep into her pillowy cleavage, leaving an indent, he looked up in shock at her face. For a brief second he noted her beauty, although she wasn't as feminine as he liked. And that soft feeling that encompassed his body? How very odd, and very much unlike what he was used to, unable to figure out what that "used to" was at the moment. Oh that's right, those are boobs.

A tiny fountain of blood instinctively rose out of his nose, creating a beautiful median arc. His eyes began to close out of anemia and straight-out exhaustion, seeing the girl's face turn red from embarrassment of the pillow piglet. This was the end for him.

_"Shit!"_ It wasn't the end! At least not yet, it could be if he doesn't hurry. Although the elapsed time it took from ground to chest to blood was mere seconds, the priestess was surely only a foot away. Do it like they tell you to on the morning radio exercises! Straighten your body and slide down into the dark depths of heaven.

Four hands followed the piglet. None of them were the red-haired girl's.

"GET OUT OF NEE-SAMA'S CLOTHES! THAT'S MY JOB!"

"-AND I WILL USE YOUR THIGHS FOR CURRY!"

"YAMATE!" the red-haired girl screamed as four hands grabbed parts she didn't even know she had. They both knew what a piglet's skin felt like, but one was in too much of a panic to let him get away, and the other one just plain didn't care.

"EEEK! HE'S IN MY BACK!"

"-LONG AND PAINFUL DEATH-!"

"-VIOLATING ONEE-SAMA'S BODY-!"

"IIYAAH! HE'S CRAWLING DOWN MY PANTS!"

"-RENDER YOUR FLESH-!"

"-ONLY I TOUCH HER LIKE-!"

Pafu!

"DAMMIT MIKOTO! THAT'S NOT IT AND YOU KNOW IT!"

_"WHERE IN THE WORLD AM I NOW?!"_ an exasperated piglet screamed to himself. There was no telling how many times he had traversed her body, which was now practically naked from all the groping and tearing of clothes. Finally wriggling his way past a tight belt, he slid down her silky leg and ran as fast as he could, swerving like a drunken driver from the loss of blood and shear perversity of what he just did. Oh the things he had seen and felt. He would remember to leave this part out when talking to Akari about his little adventure.

One giant heap of skin and legs splayed everywhere far behind the piglet. The red-haired girl continued to be stripped by the girl she walked next to, who had long stopped caring about the piglet, as they both lay on top of the tinier priestess, still emitting rays of hatred at the piglet.

"I'LL FIND YOU EVEN IF I HAVE TO TEAR EVERY PIECE OF CLOTHING OFF-!"

"HE'S GONE! STOP IT BEFORE I KNOCK YOUR LIGHTS OUT!"

"I'LL…GET…YOU…!"

Even though he could hardly see straight, he had no choice but to dash into the woods. Otherwise the trail of blood he left behind would have been an easy marker for him should they decide to continue chase.

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Sigh. What mess had this little piglet gotten himself into? First was the killer priestess, the buxom tomboy, and the female Kuno, all of whom he probably pissed off one way or another. There was no way this place could get any weirder or more dangerous, so why was it that the piglet knew that was wrong?

_"Right now I have to figure out where I am,"_ the piglet thought as he hopped over a fallen log. _"After I left Tokyo I headed North to Hokkaido…"_ the piglet thought, when in reality he actually headed southwest towards Kobe. _"I went to Nagano to get myself back on track when I found myself in Osaka…" _the piglet thought, when in reality he went to Seoul. _"And then I left Bangkok on the Siberian Express that stopped in Hakodate…" _the piglet thought, when in reality he boarded a tuna boat that left Okinawa and wasn't scheduled to return to the mainland for six months.

A lone tear dropped onto the ground next to the piglet's hoof. This could not be the end, it just cannot be. Stuck in a remote area of the world where he had managed to upset every single one of the inhabitants he had come across. If only he could get a bearing on his exact location, then he would definitely make his way to Japan, alibi on a one-week or more margin of error.

But first he had to find what part of the world he was in.

_"Let's see…tropical trees…white sand…clear ocean. Probably the Caribbean's…"_ If one remembers correctly, that is not so far out of the little piglet's ability._ "But wait, the natives spoke Japanese, so I can't be that far away from Japan itself!"_

How exciting! He was only a couple hundred miles at best from Japan, probably on one of its many islands even. All that was needed was to change back into his normal form, catch the next boat to the mainland and he would be home free.

Up in the distance something caught his eye. It was small, very wispy, and the piglet would have missed it had he not felt the sudden jolt of excitement.

Smoke, a very thin line of smoke wafted over the treetops in front of him. Where there was smoke, there was fire. And where there was fire, there were bound to be more humans. There had been no sign of storms, so lightning was out of the question. Not that it mattered, as the little piglet squealed in delight and bounded off towards the signal. It was almost as if that signal was made especially for him.

The road curved slightly as the piglet charged at full speed. A man-made road, girls wandering that very road, there was bound to be civilization. And as he crested the hill that led directly to the billowing smoke, his eyes were greeted with a most wonderful sight.

_"People!"_ People all over this quaint little village. Women in the fields digging and cultivating the vegetables, women on the rooftops fixing the roofing to straw huts, women talking and laughing and conversing with other women along the tiny roads that led to other women doing various jobs around this village.

To this little piglet, there was nothing odd about this village whatsoever.

It is very difficult to hum as a piglet, yet this one managed to pull it off. He skipped merrily down the hill leading into the village, looking for anything that he could use to change him back into his original form, all the while watching the women walk by him.

"Awww! Look at the little piglet! Isn't he cute?" One girl said as she passed him, giggling. Doing his very best to show her his smile he continued on.

"It looks like he has an owner with that little bandana."

"Really?! Too bad, I was thinking of taking him home."

_"Such sweet girls,"_ the piglet thought. His little black face blushed as girls cooed and "aww"ed as he walked by. He had no problem letting them scratch his head or pet his backside when they wanted to; in fact he was very much enjoying the attention. But the little piglet was on a mission and wasted little time in finding the nearest case of hot water.

"Where are you going little guy?" One of the multitudes of girls asked as he walked along.

Okay just one more tummy rub.

Now he was ready, the last ten minutes of petting was more than enough for him and he dashed off in search of anything he could use to make some hot water.

And what luck! There sitting out in the open was a kettle, hovering slightly above a small fire with a trickle of steam pouring out of the spout. Oh what a happy day!

Ding.

He stopped. Something was wrong. Something was very wrong. It took until now for it to click in, but there was something…odd about this village. Other than the fact it looked like it had not advanced in technology since the Edo era and that it seemed completely inhabited by nothing but women, something was wrong.

The feeling was still there when he shrugged it off and took a couple steps closer to the kettle. There would be plenty of time later to figure it out, and after all, there was nothing he could not do in his normal form.

But something clawed at him; something gnawed on the back of his skull, something that told him it was a very, very, BAD idea to change back. Why? This was a normal village, if archaic. Women were harvesting the crops, women were carrying on normal conversations (ones he thought women regularly do), women were working, women were playing, and women were doing everything normal it took to maintain a village. With a snort, he took a couple steps closer to the kettle. Until…

_"Wait a minute…"_ he looked behind him at the field where the women worked, _"Where are all the men…?"_

Could it be…? No, it had to be a mistake, just his mind playing tricks on him. He would find a guy just to prove that this island wasn't completely inhabited by women, and he would have a good laugh about it when he changed back.

A ladder on the side of the house! Surely a man wouldn't let a woman do just tedious work by herself.

But there she was, happily laying straw across the roof.

Ah ha! Someone was using a hammer! A man's work, construction, building. There was no denying that there was a man there.

But there she was…long pointy auburn hair, a large smile on her face as she pounded a nail into a wooden beam.

Now, the piglet began to worry a bit.

At the river! His back turned to the piglet, short hair, and slightly muscular build! They must be fishing; the men in this village must be fishermen!

"Well hey little guy. What do you want from Auntie Suzuka?" The masculine girl smiled at the piglet, who trembled feverishly at the realization surrounding him.

In the market?!

No! All women!

Carrying the water?!

No! A woman too!

In the bathhouse?!

Here too!

"Squee." A small trickle of blood ran down the piglet's nose.

Exhausted, completely drained of strength and energy, the piglet swayed across the road with a dazed look. He contemplated the situation surrounding him, doing his best to think of the most plausible solution as to why there was not a single male in the village.

Death? It was possible that he had drowned and went to Heaven, but no. If he had truly died he would no longer be stuck in this cursed form, and all the women would…

A small trickle of blood ran down the piglet's nose.

But how to explain the absence of testosterone (excluding himself). An advanced civilization where science had given women the power to give birth without any men? But then what about the grass huts and ragged clothes? That was a stupid idea!

Maybe he had gone back in time to the Feudal Era? No! There should still be men around. That too was a stupid idea!

The piglet thought, he thought hard. This was a place that was obviously cut off from the outside world, he knew that much. But the men…the men…

Then it hit him. Like a ton of bricks it hit him. There were men here; there were probably many men. But they all died…perished long ago…because…

_"THEY ATE THEM! This is a town full of male-hating, cannibalistic, Amazonian women! And if I change back they're going to eat me too!"_

That's right. To Ryoga, this made perfect sense.

**TO BE CONTINUED…**

Author's Notes: How did I do to keep **NA** specific information out of this story? I hope people fluent in **Ranma ½** did not have too much trouble reading this story.

Please R&R.


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